Personality ,what makes you the way you are, by Daniel Nettle

This  book on personality by Daniel Nettle , published by Oxford University Press in 2007 (298 pages)  is one of the oxford Landmark Science books. It cer  helps you to know your self , understand  better those around you and also  tries to answer the question if we can change our personality.

        The book starts with  a request to fill up a brief questionnaire  of 12 questions  to assess yourself on the big five  personality  dimensions..(The  Newcastle Personality assessor).The dimensions are:

1.     Extraversion.

2.     Neuroticism.

3.     Conscientiousness.

4.     Agreeableness.

5.     Openness.

You assess your self , with  your scores in respect of each of the five dimensions. Only by the time you reach near the end of the book , you get to realize the full meaning of these dimensions , and  you begin  to look afresh at your self.

         What is personality?  It is not just what we do repeatedly  in the large-scale narratives of our lives- love , career , friendships- which tend to be somewhat consistent over time , it is also what we do in tiny interactions  which shows the same kind of patterns over our whole life. Naturally , we want to know about our own personality, and also about the personality of other people .

     The big  five  personality dimensions are  extraversion, neuroticism, Conscientiousness, Agreeableness and openness.

1.     Extraversion is responsiveness of positive emotions. In the high scorer , the responsiveness is great , and so the person is prepared   to work hard  to get the buzz of company , excitement , achievement , adulation and romance. For an introvert ,  the psychological benefits of getting these things are fewer.

An introvert  is not motivated  to go out , put in efforts or fight out for them.

     2.Neuroticism:Neuroticism is to negative emotions what extraversion is to positive emotions. Negative emotions  are an interconnected group including fear, anxiety, shame, guilt , disgust , and sadness  that are deeply unpleasant to experience. High scorers on neuroticism  have    more groundless worries  and  more negative emotions. They have low self esteem, higher rates of depression. They are workaholics and  get better academic results. Neuroticism is a (weak) positive predictor of success for professional occupations.

3.Conscientiousness: They are able to control impulses. Very low Conscientiousness means an addictive personality  that can’t stop doing  things  even when they are damaging. The smarter people are , the less conscientious they are. It is not true that conscientiousness brings only benefits. High Conscientiousness  in an extreme form  is called obsessive –compulsive personality disorder.( not related to  obsessive-compulsive disorder).It is preoccupation with orderliness,  perfectionism, and mental control  at the expense of flexibility, openness and efficiency. Sticking to the plan and schedule  becomes the main issue and the actual  point of activity is entirely lost. Inter personal relationships are badly affected by OCPD , as a result. There is no spontaneity. Perfectionism is just very high Conscientiousness.

4. Agreeableness:   High scorers on agreeableness  are cooperative , trusting  and empathetic , while low scorers are  cold-hearted, hostile and non-compliant. Such    high scorer   people have ‘other-regarding preferences’. They are quick to forgive and slow to anger. At the very extreme low-Agreeableness  are psychopaths  who are completely egocentric , remorseless, dishonest, incapable of love , and disposed to  use others entirely to forward their own ends.  When degree of agreeableness is so high that  a person completely sacrifices  his or her own needs, values, options , pleasures and goals in order to serve the desires of others , it is ‘dependent personality disorder’. Research shows that the less Agreeable  the executive, the better they do; or, nice guys finish last. Personal success  tends to mean low Agreeableness. In general , women are higher in Agreeableness  than men are. This implies that the share of women in top positions  will not be 50 percent but less because of Agreeableness factor.

5. Openness: It  means broad associations of meaning, restless unconventionality, supernatural beliefs  and psychosis-like experiences. Openness  predicts creativity and innovative ness.

     Personality traits have  50 percent heritable component. The other half is environmentally induced  personality  variation. Can we change our personalities , or are we just stuck with them? You can choose to avoid certain people  who bring out the worst in you. You can keep yourself away from contexts where aspects of your personality  that you are unhappy with  will surface.  You  all carry useless and outdated notions  of what we should be and why. From time to time ,  you  should shed these notions.  You  should reframe our story. Also , you need to change your behaviour. But it  does not mean that we can change our personality. It means understanding your personality and using this information to make wise choices.

     Personality is a very clear and comprehensive book .It has certainly helped me to know my self and has increased my self awareness. I highly recommend  the readers to read this book .In fact, you should not miss it.